Wow, I really am addicted to making videos. It’s fun because it’s like standup but I don’t have to 1) make people laugh or 2) leave my apartment.
It is strange to go from having a secret pseudonym blog for a year and half to making videos every three days. Let’s be real- it’ll probably be no good for my writing. But it’s fun in another way.
I felt really tired at the end of this week, and that feeling kind of culminated in me getting into it on twitter with Julia Serano, which….man, it actually felt totally ok. She should watch how she talks about other people’s lives if she doesn’t want to get called out about it.
It’s interesting how much energy maintaining a separation in yourself takes. For the past year and a half I’ve been writing a secret blog (I told a lot of my friends about it, it wasn’t totally separate) and worried about how this would end up interacting with my real life. And now it’s all one life, and so far that’s just fine. So far, cool. I do organizing stuff with other detransitioned people, we support each other’s voices, we look for ways to create some care for detransitioned people and also for ways to stop inappropriate transition from happening in the first place. I’m not sure why I was so scared of being this person.
I don’t know folks. Being integrated feels nice. Life is so weird. But it finally feels ok. I live a weird life but I’m finally not freaked out about it. That’s really, really cool.